Fun, Safe & Enjoyable Anal Sex

AGWDM safe fun enjoyable anal sexFor as much as we hear about the joys of anal sex, especially for heterosexual couples, it’s something that’s still pretty much unchartered territory for most people. It’s only been in the past few years that a lot of straight men have wanted to explore the pleasures of anal sex. For women, researchers of the National Survey of Family Growth found that out of 10,463 women between the ages of 18 and 82, only 36.3% of them have tried anal sex and only 13.2% of them have had anal sex in the past 12 months.

Porn has played a big role in sexually curious and adventurous couples wanting to try out anal sex. A friend of mine who manages a sex toy shop in my neighborhood says that the biggest growth in his store’s sales has been in anal sex toys. He also says that he and his staff spend a lot of time managing customer’s expectations and providing a lot of anal sex education.

Before you get into penetrative anal sex with a penis or a dildo for the first time, start with some anal play with your finger or a small anal plug and start off slow. If you’re using an anal plug, use made from a non-porous material like glass, silicone or metal, which don’t absorb and entrap unhealthy bacteria and viruses. They can be easily sanitized in boiling water before and after use. Make sure that your anal plug has a flanged end so that it doesn’t get lodged in your or your partner’s butt.

Chances are that you may not want to graduate a bigger butt plug or dildo. The greatest feel-good sensations of anal sex comes from the first few inches of the anal opening, There are tons of nerve endings that are packed under the surface under the surface of the skin and tissue. And there’s no need to go ramming in fast and hard. Slow and easy strokes can be delightfully orgasmic-inducing for both men and women.

Going slow not only feels good, but unlike the vagina that’s designed to accept a penis, the anus needs coaxing. It doesn’t naturally expand and widen like a vagina does when it’s aroused. Plus, it’s a much smaller opening that’s not naturally designed for things to go in. If you’re too fast and rough, rips and tears can occur easily in an unbroken virgin ass, which can lead to pain, infections and an increased risk of transmitting STIs and STDs.

Men, regardless of their sexual orientation, get to have double the fun when it comes to anal play. Use a finger or a prostate massager to give your prostate and extra nudge to get those love juices flowing and squirting and to bring on powerful orgasms.

The prostate is located about two inches below the rectum toward the scrotum. After inserting a finger (or two, if you’re feeling comfortable), you should feel a chestnut-sized ball. Move your finger or a prostate massager in a “come hither” motion toward the navel to stimulate the prostate to the point of orgasm.

Finding the prostate is relatively easy. It swells when aroused. Like inserting a penis in a vagina, you don’t want to start poking around until a guy’s shaft is hard.

When using a finger, butt plug or prostate massager, always use a quality anal lube. I mean ALWAYS and use lots of it. The anus has no lubrication and friction can be painful. Anal sex should never be painful.

Before you stick anything in the butt, massage around the whole anal area by using a mixture of circles around and firm strokes across the anus, starting lightly and slowly building up the pressure. This is about stimulating the area around the anus and help you or your relax and get used to how it feels.

A word of warning about anal lubes: do not use a desensitizing lube. You want to be fully aware of the sensations you feel, especially if you start to hurt. And why would you want to numb enjoyable sensations?

Flavored anal desensitizing lubes are a double no. If you’re curious about analingus, why would you want to numb your partner’s anus and taste buds? It’s the stupidest pleasure product on the market, yet people buy it. Doesn’t make sense, does it?

A lot of people prefer to do an enema before they have anal sex for obvious reasons. It’s all about cleanliness and anal (and sometime vaginal) stimulation can bring on the need to defecate. If you’re going to do an enema, do it several hours before you plan to have anal sex. It may take people that long to fully expel any water and by-products that gets shot up into and come out the lower gastrointestinal tract.

When and if you decide to move onto penile penetrative anal sex, use a condom. You can contract or introduce an STI in the rectum. Plus, it’s an easy way to stay clean. Never use the same condom (or sex toy) if you’re moving from anal to vaginal sex.

Interested in an anal dildo? Start with one that has ½ inch diameter and made from a non-porous material like the ones suggested for butt plugs. Like butt plugs, make sure your anal dildo has a flared base to it doesn’t get stuck in your ass. Some anal dildos come with a suction cup base so you can attach it to a wall.

If you plan on using an anal dildo with a strap-on harness, make sure it has a round base that will fit snugly in the attachment on the harness. Most sex toy shops will let you try out a dildo on a harness to make sure it’s a secure fit and easy to take on and off before you buy it.

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About Bobbie Morgan (1247 Articles)
Bobbie Morgan is the beditor-in-chief of A Good Woman's Dirty Mind. When she's not blogging or having the best sex ever, she's putting out writing and social media services for adult businesses. Use the contact link to reach her by email.

4 Comments on Fun, Safe & Enjoyable Anal Sex

  1. ” the anus needs coaxing. ” Well said.
    I used to contribute to another forum a lot and we regularly got asked about “How do I get my wife/GF” to accept anal sex. This is the wrong approach guys. It’s all about seduction, how to get the love/lust partner in your life to want anal sex. Take it slow, it might take days, weeks or even months, The anus has another job to do in this world, so some days it won’t appreciate your attention, fine, back off try another day, hey we’ve all got a arse we all know that sometimes it’s nicer to know than other days.
    Start off slow and try stimulating the area between her pussy and her arse, this is very sensitive in most people. I’ve never touched a lady there and not had some reaction. Start by touching her pussy, I’ve always found the best way to start is with oral, and while you are licking her clit you can finger her pussy, once that’s working think where your knuckles of your other fingers are going, just start by gently brushing the area just south of her pussy and feel how she reacts. It it’s positive move forward, if not then back off for a while today might not be the day. You want to feel her body trying to encourage your fingers, you want to feel her trying to get you to touch her nearer your goal. If she’s encouraging you then you’re heading in the right direction. Play hard to get, the more you tease her, the more likely she is to want it. If you have the patience then leave it there and let her think about it, think how good things felt, she might not even have noticed exactly what felt good.
    Eventually, you hope, you’ll make it to the point where you can touch her actual anus and she’s working with you, driving you forward.
    In terms of getting inside, use a gentle (always gentle) come hither motion. When she’s ready you’ll find your finger sliding inside very easily.
    Oh, back off when she cums. You’ll likely need to start again from the beginning. If you don’t believe me, try this on yourself, it can go from feeling exquisite to painful in a moment once the urgent need of hunt to cum is over.
    Once you’ve had a finger inside you can work up to more. How big is your cock compared with your fingers? Two fingers? Three? Before trying your cock aim to get more fingers inside than the size of manhood.
    Once you make it inside remember what I said about “if she cums” be prepared to exit quite quickly. Don’t expect to cum in there first time. Patience and more patience is the key to seduction.

  2. Bobbie Morgan // September 9, 2015 at 1:30 pm // Reply

    Thanks for your excellent advice. It really helps for people to hear this advice from more than one person.

    • And it would really help if there were more sources about this topic than porn. The whole depiction of sex there tends to be miles from reality, but for anal sex its so far out of what most people will ever experience it may as well be a cartoon.
      There is a reason why the phrase “It hurts like buggery” has entered the language because if you rush in it will do. Yet this is how it is normally depicted in videos, most pussies wouldn’t want to be entered straight away too hard and too suddenly.
      Yet get it right and it is a magical experience.
      To me the great joy is knowing that my lover is so excited, so in the moment, that normal inhibitions have been brushed aside and what is left is pure naked lust for the feelings and the moment in hand.

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