Ask the Sexpert

Ms. Q & A: Is She Faking Her Orgasms?

Dear Ms. Q,

After a very long relationship, I finally managed to make my partner gush during an orgasm while fingering her. It was simply magical & a moment I’d remember forever.

But that’s the problem; it’s only been this moment when any real gush or fluid has spilt. Normally she climaxes by clenching her thighs & pushing me away at a time when I think it’s all about to happen. I really haven’t seen her soak the sheets or spill before.

So, has she been faking all this time?

Wondering Willie

Dear Wondering,

It’s hard to say.

According to some facts I’ve shared on faking orgasms

• Forty-eight percent of women and men have faked an orgasm at least once in their life.
• Four in 10 women have faked orgasm in the last 12 months, while only 17% of men have admitted to faking it in the same time frame.
• Almost 70% of women don’t reach orgasm during sexual intercourse.
If there’s any such thing as a well-intentioned lie, women lie about and fake vaginal or clitoral orgasms because they don’t want to insult their lover.

Personally, I don’t see how it’s possible to fake it. When I orgasm, my vagina tightens like a vise, my body tightens and I clench my thighs, I get very naturally lubricated (cum), I pant and gasp pretty hard, and I’m loud. Uncontrollably loud. Like primal beast loud. I would say if a partner has to ask, it’s because he (or she) isn’t paying attention to physical responses or is completely clueless.

I can’t say I’ve ever pushed anyone away when I orgasm, but that’s just me.

However, gushing (or female ejaculation or squirting) is a whole other thing. It’s hard to not notice the gush of clear fluid or the wet spot whether it’s a couple of tablespoons or a cup or more of fluid. Plus, gushing is a whole different response than having an orgasm or coming. It may or not be a response to an orgasm. It’s a whole different sensation. Sometimes, it’s totally involuntary and happens without warning. At other times, I’ve felt pressure in the area of my G-spot.

I’m glad to hear you gushing about your gushing experience. I hope the two of you have many more experiences like that to come.

Ms. Q

Got a question for me? Email me at msquote2(at)hotmail(dot)com.