Relationship Ramblings

When a Kiss Isn’t Just a Kiss

As I get ready for another long weekend rendezvous with my lover, I can’t get my mind off a scene that repeats itself each time we reunite.

It starts with the moment I see him when in the airport terminal lobby. Our eyes lock. Our faces brighten. The biggest smiles come upon our faces.

A moment later, we are locked in each other’s arms. The only things our lips speak are kisses. Gentle, soft, yet powerful kisses. They’re kisses that are moist and send a wild, winding web of tingling pulses throughout my body. I’m sure to others we look like something straight out of a movie, but to me, it’s the most exhilarating feeling I’ve ever experienced in my life. And the cravings we’ve had for each other for the weeks that preceded this moment catapult us into desire that can’t be quenched soon enough.

Kisses come in all sorts of forms that can’t be categorized into one feeling, meaning or sensation, but in the realm of sex, I feel that kisses are underrated.

For me, the most sensual and powerful kisses are the lightest kisses … the kinds when two sets of lips barely meet and when the tips of tongues quickly dart or dance with one another. There’s no need to tangle tongues like dueling mops in a bucket and slobbering is not sexy. Just flick the tip of the tongue as you would a clit. Don’t be tentative; just enjoy and indulge in the moment. Take your time as if you were savoring really good chocolate or scotch.

I love lip sucking, but that, too, is best done gently and not with the force and power of a shop-vac. Go about it as if you’re savoring the sweetness and juiciness of a single raspberry.

If you’re doing it right, kisses should move beyond the mouth. Don’t go straight for the penis or vagina. Take your time. Gently lead up the side of the neck and to the earlobe. Suck on the earlobe like you would the lips. Think of a bite in the crook between the neck and the shoulder as like the same kind of jolt as you would get from a spank. It’s a sexy way to get things moving to the next level.

Kissing is a great form of foreplay. Don’t think of it as just a subtle way to warm up a woman; it’s a wonderful way to explore each other and it’s an enjoyable journey.

Build up the anticipation by leaving a trail of soft pecks from the clavicle and down the sternum before you get to the breasts and nipples. And, yes, most men enjoy nipple kissing, sucking, licking and biting, too. Men’s nipples are just as sexually sensitive as women’s nipples.

Kissing is also a great lead-in to oral sex. Leave a trail of soft pecks down your partner’s belly. Stop to lick your partner’s belly button just as you would the tip of her clit or his penis. Linger with those soft kisses and licks a bit at the crease between the top of your partner’s leg and groin. A little pleading or begging never hurt anyone; it just makes eventuality of oral sex even more intense and enjoyable.

I know there are some casual sex partners who avoid kissing mostly because of the association of being romantically or emotionally attached to someone. My advice is to get over it. Being a great kisser is just as important as being skilled at any other sexual act.

For those of you who are or want to be romantically involved with someone, I’m sure you can appreciate when a kiss is just a simple way to say, “I love you.”